Antardwand - the war within

I often used to laugh it off when people used to tell me that it’s hard to loose weight because then I was among those blessed ones with almost the desired weight. Five years down, people now laugh at me when I frantically try to convince them with my various antics about how difficult it is to loose “the weight”. The first two precious weeks of the weight loss war had passed, people around me were celebrating their successes of shedding kilos while I was still caught in a war with my inner self…….to eat or not to eat. Exercising often perceived by me as a mundane activity now seemed an inevitable activity I would have to take up despite my whole body screaming to be left alone. And so in the third week …….

I gifted myself a static cycle which I on and off mount (most of the time for fear of my husband who might nag me for making a lousy investmentJ). Five minutes of cycling and that’s was it. (Why? I was not in the war to give the Bollywood hotties a run for their money!). I started looking for easier get ways to loose weight without tiring my limbs. Brilliance struck me and I felt cutting on my diet would do the magic. Needless to say surviving on modest measures of food, my soul felt torn, cheated and deprived. But listening to the other warriors stirred something inside me….though my obesity often work as a shock absorbent and so things don’t hit me real hard (Thank God!)

Another week down (4rth week)…… my senses are still surviving the irresistible aroma of a strong cup of my husband’s coffee. It’s been days since I have had my morning dose of caffeine. Surprisingly, I am not eating much during the meetings and workshops (hey this is not ME!). Paying heed to the co-warriors, I have shifted my cycle to the TV room…voila my cycling time has gone up to 20 minutes (on an average). One thing that I have realized in these weeks is that I first need to win my inner war to finally make a mark in the weight loss war!

Till the next time… the war continues….

Till the next time… the war continues….